Serious topic: my foot fetish

[blablablabla]

Since this seems like one of the most active footboards I can find, I'll go ahead and post my story here. I realize 99% of the topics on this board are either pictures or picture requests, but I hope some of you are willing to take a look at my story and give me some insight.

I'm a 25 year old male and I'm a virgin. I don't consider myself ugly by any standard, but I haven't outed myself yet, which is why I have zero sexual experience.

As if being gay wasn't bad enough, I'm also stuck with a foot fetish. This wouldn't be so much of a problem, if it wasn't for the fact that male feet are the only thing that get me excited. This is the core of my problem, I am totally turned off by both male and female nudity. I wouln't ever want to suck a dick or get one in my ass (excuse me for my explicit language but I see no way to talk around this :p), nor do I feel excited by the idea of taking a man (or a woman) from behind. All I care for are feet (and I'm pretty picky as well).

This ofcourse raises a lot of questions. Are there other people like me out there? Will I ever be able to have sex without making sacrifices? Is having yourself jacked off by a pair of feet even considered "sex"? How do you explain a guy you're gay but you don't like dicks?

I realise I'm really far behind for my age, and a lot of these questions sound like things a 15 year-old would ask, but I hope people can take my post seriously. After all, being gay is still frowned upon by a lot of people, but having a fetish is even worse and a lot of people just can't understand. So there is not really a lot of people to talk to...

[Franz]

Well, BBBB, yes, any person-to-person activity that makes you get erect and have a sexual orgasm is considered "sex". (It amazes me how many guys who post on this site seem to think that arousal from feet somehow doesn't qualify as a 'real arousal' or sex!) Yes, there are quite a number of individual male foot fetishists who really cannot reach sexual orgasm unless a partner's feet come into play in the exchange. You admit that to date you've had no real sexual exchange with other guys. Okay, that's not unusual in reality among guys who are young. While you may dismiss this point, I will just tell you that when you do experiences a sexual encounter with another man, you will find that the distaste you feel about a man's other erogenous zones will "melt in the heat" of an actual sexual encounter/exchange. You may not think so, but for at least 99% of human males, this is the fact. So, try to relax and give yourself some breathing room.

[BootsMcGraw]

B4, here are links to a few discussions on this board relevant to your post, which may interest you.

http://www.footbuddies.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8403

http://www.footbuddies.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8246

http://www.footbuddies.com/forum/showthread.php?t=15324

[culfoxio]

Hi BlaBlaBlaBla .....
Believe me, YOU are NOT the only one who's been or is "in your shoes" !! I have experienced the same exact situation as you -- I am in my early 40s and it wasn't until I was 33 that I had a sexual contact with anyone -- a man of course, a co-worker of mine while we were on a business trip to Paris. And that was just touching, "innocent" stuff -- he wanted to fuck me and while we shared a bed, we didn't do nothing more than just jerk each other off. I really wasn't turned on at all by his feet so it felt real awkward. I know appreciate the other aspects of man-to-man sex, but I am not crazy about it. If I enjoy the man, if I find him sexy then I can pretty much do anything he wants me to, but I do it as "payment" for him letting me enjoy his feet. FEET is what I think 95% of the time when I think of a guy. I have many friends who are gorgeous, muscular, young but their feet DON'T turn me on, so I don't get aroused AT ALL whether they are naked or whatever. I would much, MUCH rather have an ugly, skinny guy with stunning, rough masculine feet than a college-age football playing stud with mediocre or plain feet. Believe me when I say that You are NOT THE ONLY ONE that gets turned on only by FEET!!! There is solidarity out there!

[TheWolf9]

Greetings. You and I are in the same boat. :)

I have experimented with both guys and girls and I don't like either. Kissing grosses me out (feeling them sticking their tongue in my mouth and sucking on my tongue), anal is downright uncomfortable (feels like constipation) and blowjobs simply don't work for me.

However, feet are my specialty. Ever since I started masturbating in 7th grade (about 10 years ago) I've always masturbated to feet and footwear (sandals, boots, moccasins, etc). I've never masturbated to sex or boobs or penises. Always the feet.


We are basically Asexuals (lack of sexual orientation) or Footsexuals (turned on by feet strictly) and as your foot fetish grows, so will the number of people with the same interest.

[flickfire]

You have to realize that your not alone in dealing with your situation Bla. Lots of people
are turned on by male feet, and if that´s the only part you like of a guy, then it´s nothing
to be ashamed of. I think maybe you should try posting some ads either here, or on another
place where you can be more SPECIFIC about who you are, and what you want from
a guy i.e., friendship and foot contact.

The best way to have foot contact with a guy(str8 or gay) is to be friends with him first,
then once he feels like he can trust you, he may allow you in a private setting to have the
contact that you want with his feet. A lot of guys finds it strange that someone wants to
get at their feet(because mostly of all the negative connotations that we have with feet in
this culture), but once guys get foot rubs, massages, etc., they tend to enjoy it, and really
see no reason to stop it.


I think if you´re patient and specific about what you want, in time you´ll will get the contact with guys´feet that you want.

A big welcome to you here, by the way!

[Richieuk]

...The best way to have foot contact with a guy(str8 or gay) is to be friends with him first,
then once he feels like he can trust you, he may allow you in a private setting to have the
contact that you want with his feet. A lot of guys finds it strange that someone wants to
get at their feet(because mostly of all the negative connotations that we have with feet in
this culture), but once guys get foot rubs, massages, etc., they tend to enjoy it, and really
see no reason to stop it.

This man speaks the truth. I myself have always fantasized about been at another mans feet primarily when masturbating, i do finds other things about men hot though, but it is their feet that for me seems like 'the main event' :). Anyway...i always thought it would be something i would never get to experience (i'm still a 'virgin'), something that you only read about in stories online or places like this, but it doesn't really happen to guys like me... WRONG! I could go into serious depth and write my own story, but i'll keep it short - i'm in a 'foot relationship' with an extremely good straight friend at the moment. It started off jokingly a while ago when i let slip i had a foot fetish, but he was cool with it. He loves having me sit on the floor at the bottom of his bed before he goes to sleep and worship his feet. He has problems getting to sleep sometimes and he says the only thing that puts him to sleep is a "long foot massage", and i'm happy to oblige ;). I will literally spend hours at his feet sometimes, whether it's while he's in bed, while we're watching a film on the couch, he loves it. Heh, the first time we 'did it', i had been massaging his feet for about an hour or so then just went for it and started licking his feet and he let me just go for it, but then he fell asleep and i felt guilty still going while he was asleep so stopped, but then as soon as i got into bed i disturbed him slightly and he said "you finished already? You can get back down there if you want while i sleep"...How could i say no???

Right i've rambled on too much, i only wanted to reply to show you support by saying you are not alone, and even if you think this sort of thing won't happen to you, trust me, it does! Keep the faith :D

[ChicaToes]

greetings from BoyWonder in Chicago...I also am in the baot as all you guys are..man how I wish we were avail to meet, maybe not a bad idea as a group event somwhere just as the bondage and tickle events. Feet and male feet have always fascinated me..tied up, bare, shoes no socks, sweaty, smelly, grunge...roleplay and those good old BATMAN shows when i always wanted to see Robin barefoot at least just ONCE and foot tortured..getting tied up and havin my toes dipped in peanut butter and havin a guy lick it off sent me over the moon..odd as it is that the straight guys LOVE foot worship or love a good footrub or dream about the subject while guys that are gay admit its a turn off, hate their feet, hate the worship idea..ever so odd its not reversed?! Always willin to chat, hope to connect and maybe all of us here that want this a reality can make it so...

[Franz]

Yep, ChicaToes, I've noted the same dichotomy myself that you described--hetero guys, married or single, typically are much more open and receptive to me playing with, rubbing, sniffing, etc., their feet (I have never had a single hetero guy ever demur or exhibit icks about me enjoying his feet), while gay guys typically are much less open and receptive to foot action than het guys are. I've never quite understood this peculiarity in the divergent attitude and reaction to their feet being enjoyed and played with, either. I surmised, eventually, that a straight guy wants so badly to be thought hot and desirable by someone that he'll remain open and receptive to me pleasuring his feet, while most gay men are bogged down on coming off as thoroughly conventional (within the paradigm of their gayness) and so tend to be less open and receptive. Just a surmise. It would be interesting to get some fellow foot-loving gay guys' viewpoint on why this counterintuitive reaction seems to predominate.

[Richieuk]

You know i've never really thought of it before, but in my personal experience what you have just both said is really accurate @ Franz and ChicaToes. Personally, i don't think i would particularly enjoy someone worshipping my feet, but would let someone do it if it was what they wanted to do.

I think the alphamale / betamale idea comes into play partially with situations like this, where there's a 'dominant' straight guy and the 'submissive' gay guy been at his feet. Not saying that all gay guys are submissive to straight guys, but i have the opinion that gay guys into feet generally have a submissive side to them, that's why we love showing respect to the alpha male and worshipping his feet for him. I obviously speak for myself here, but i know that's a major factor in why i like feet. I really like the idea of me been somehow less of a man compared to the straight guy and he has all the power, and i bet that's why they like it aswel, they like to feel powerful.

I don't have any experience with worshipping a gay guys feet, but i don't think i would enjoy it as much because i would feel like their equal rather than their 'bitch' as it is with me and my straight friend, and that's a huge turn on for me.

All what i have just said is pure personal opinion, and i'm only writing from my own experience and why it is i think i like feet. If you think what i've said is rubbish, reply and tell us why, this topic is really interesting to me and i want to hear why other gays guys like feet. Is it only the physical side of it i.e. the look, smell, taste of the foot, no matter who it belongs to, straight, gay or whatever. Or is it like i said, more of the mental side of things that gets you off (even though you still like the physical aspect of feet)?.... :D

[ftslave67]

Welcome, bbbb, as you can see, you're among friends here. I think as you grow older, you won't think of it as "being stuck", but just an interesting facet of your personality. And maybe some of the "turn-off" of nudity will fade away. Being "out" is not a prerequisite to having experiences, but it may make it easier to find a partner. Anal sex is not for everyone, and it's not a requirement. I didn't think I'd enjoy mutual when I was younger, but it's kind of awesome. You don't feel like a freak because the other guy understands. There are some guys out there into acting dominant, though, if that's what you're looking for.

I think the key is to be cautious, but not afraid. Foot sex is fairly safe, but just be prepared anyway. Don't let anyone force you into anything. Guys I've met here have been pretty awesome.

[drummer]

You don't sound terribly happy with your own sexual feelings. You say, "As if being gay wasn't bad enough, I'm also stuck with a foot fetish," which doesn't sound as if you're all that content with your own feelings.

I do agree with what many of the other men here told you about how there are plenty of other men who enjoy this fetish to the exclusion of more conventional caresses and sex, but at the same time, I'd urge you, at your ripe old age of 25, to try to keep an open mind, even about your own desires and wishes.

You may find that practices that don't please you with one man are very arousing with a different partner, and I think you have to try to develop a little flexibility here and there. Sexual engagement isn't like ordering a pizza: it's an interaction with another man who brings to it all sorts of hopes and fantasies and enjoyments and aversions of his own. With a little bit of open-mindedness, you may find that your horizons widen a bit--or you may not. But at least give things a try.

It's a bit like dealing with children who are afraid to try new dishes set before them: A very good rule to establish is, you must at least TASTE a forkful. If you don't like it, then you don't have to eat any more of it, but you must at least TASTE it.

If you're very rigid about everything, you're dooming yourself to isolation and loneliness: remember, it's only a small minority of men who are available for sex with other males; of those, an even smaller minority can really enjoy and share your enthusiasm for feet; so you must try to avoid trimming this tiny fraction of the population down even further.

And you're quite right to bring this sort of thing up for discussion here. These are the sorts of issues that all of us have had to think over too, and most of us, at least in my generation, did not have easy access to older men who'd experienced some of the same stresses and conflicts; so you're quite right to take advantage of that ability today.

[cheesehead]

Well there are different types of gay men. Most of my experience with being at a guy's feet have been with other gay men. I do however love being at a straight man's feet as well.
I have found however that within the gay community you just have to learn to "sense" which guys will be open to it. Bears and leather daddies will usually be far more open to footplay than twinks or gay guys caught up in club or bar culture and the more masculine they are the more open they seem to be as well. I usually stay away from the more feminine guys for this very reason, and tops seem to be more open to the idea than bottoms.
I'm 37 and I have also found that age can also be a factor here. An older gay man is more likely to be more secure with themselves than a guy just out of the closet who is trying to find his place in the big, bad and highly competive gay world, thus many younger gay men have a tendencies to be very concerned about image and what other people will think of them if they defy convention.

[Footlover4Ever_J]

I have felt the same way as the original poster in regards to having a foot fetish, and not really caring about other things. I still have sexual fantasies about feet to this very day, but I still keep it to myself for fear of reprisals.

I have had some experiences with str8 guys with their feet than gays, as like most others have said, the latter tend to be repulse at the thought of them looking at their feet or liking feet and not following into the norm of liking sex in a conventional way. I myself don't care much for oral as I had tried it, and anal just don't do it for me (and had a bad experience with it to which I shied away with meeting people because of it), but the foot thing is very strong; yet going into chatroom venues, guys are okay with it but will only open to it unless you can engage in said sex positons, and if not, then they're not interested completely. I tend to repent to having such a thing for feet, for I do like to try oral, kissing, massaging on regular basis, but most guys want more, and I understand that.

So, with that OP, you're not alone. We are different in our own way whether guys 'get' it or not -- embrace it!

It's good to have topics like this and express with like minds.

@cheeshead: such good analysis. Something to think about.

[ftslave67]

Also, you might want to read Dan Savage's blog at The Stranger, "Savage Love". He gives advice to the lovelorn and covers the whole gamut of human sexuality.

[seansea]

Hi,

I'm like you also. The main thing that turns me on are male bare feet. I've "compromised" with guys in the past just so I can get at their feet. It's tough to find someone who is a total foot top/bottom that want's to get together on a regular basis. All I can say to you is don't give up. He's out there somewhere.

Your young and I'm sure you'll find a match. If I didn't hang on to that same hope I'd give up on sex all together and be fully asexual. Your not alone, and if you have any questions any of us on the forum can answer or you can even PM me if you wish.

Take care!

[cheesehead]

What we really need as a community is a strong movement that's not confined to the internet. We need safe spaces to go to meet other men who are like us.
The sad thing is that having a foot fetish is the most common of all fetishes but we are still very much isolated and secluded from the rest of the gay community.
Other fetishes are freely embraced in the gay community and the straight community as well such as BDSM and leather and are almost considered typical expressions of sexuality in most gay oriented spaces, even though people with those fetishes are actually fewer than than those of us with foot fetishes. Even people who are transgendered have more of a voice and get more recognition and validation than we do.
I know from personal experience that most men find the idea of footplay erotic in varying degrees because I have been around the block enough to figure this out. The men that will enjoy footplay either as a giver or receiver is huge... but it is still something that on the surface anyway is considered "gross" or "strange" by most people when it comes to what they will intially say their opinion is on this matter.
BDSM and leather as communities have flourished because people believe those fetishes are somewhat "edgy" or "dangerous" hence making them "cool". The Bear community has exploded to become a strong part of gay culture in about a 20 year span... and yet our community is severely limited to the internet and by great distances in location.
I strongly believe that the reason for this is because liking feet is considered a submissive act, along with the idea that feet are "dirty" or "smell". I have to laugh at these attitudes because alot of the same men who think that are the same ones who will joyfully plunge their noses and tongues into another guy's asshole or pits... but they somehow think we are "dirty" for liking feet.

[peterlondon]

i have had good and bad experiences with regard to my fetish.

im quite shy about it, my best friends dont know, one time when i was rumbled i was teased mercilessly about it by a gay friend. who joked about it to everyone. its also meant that its limited me because i havent had many relationships, when i was younger and hornier i was excited even by just kissing but my fetish has gotten stronger over the years.

however if id been into anal when i first came out in manchester id be dead by now, all my friends from that time, early 1980s are no longer with us.

also my fetish has taken me all over the world and into many rich and strange experiences, such as working a bootshiner at the police academy in kiev, or licking the feet of construction workers in rome.. ive met interesting people and been places i wouldnt have done if i had stayed at home with mr right.

with the growth of the internet, and the gay rights movement more and more cities have clubs, or at least local internet groups where you can meet other men into feet. of course its easier if you live in a big city like london, thats why gay men have always gravitated towards big cities. but i know one chap in rural community who is not ashamed of his fetish and has been at the feet of of many local farmers!! and another guy, a bootlicker in the gold trading district of new york, he is completely open about his fetish and the armenian traders he works with dont seem to bat an eyelid about letting him kiss their feet

ive found with sites such as craigslist it is easier to meet bisexual gays who are often more up for it than many of the gay guys i know who have more clearly defined tastes.

to be honest i am in two minds whether my fetish has been a good or bad thing in my life, but i certainly think my being gay has been a good thing in my life, i work in a hostel for single homeless men, some quite violent, and half the staff there are gay men, thats true of all the caring professions, teaching, nursing etc. many gay people contribute greatly to society in so many ways, and gay people have so much to be proud of,

please dont ever think " as if being gay wasnt bad enough"

we have so much to be proud of

[ropedfeet]

That was a great post Peter. I enjoyed reading it very much.

I agree with you about being Gay.

I have always said that if anyone ever held a pill out and said "take this and you'll be heterosexual" my answer would be,and still would be "No thanks."

Same goes for my "kinks".

Design your own sex life. Put yourself out there. If people can't find you you have no right to complain. At least if you're putting yourself out there you have a better chance.

In many cases the biggest obstacle in getting to play with someone you would like to meet up with is distance. Yes its a pain, but one way or the other if its going to happen someone is going to have to travel. Especially in the case of guys who have "specialized interests", They are out there, just most cases not in your own city. Of course that is not always an easy thing to do, unfortunately.

And keep an open mind about possible playmates too. If you narrow it down too far you'll usually end up never doing anything with anyone.

[blablablabla]

First of all I want to thank everyone who replied in this topic. I expected at least SOME negative reactions but every single post has been incredibly supportive.

I also want to apologize for getting back here so late. I could lie and say I was "busy", but the truth of the matter is that I was kinda embarrassed. I haven't talked openly about my feelings with anyone before, so even writing this down on an online forum was already a step for me. I figured I'd let it rest a little and come back when I was ready to explore some more.

I've read anything carefully and agree with most of what has been said. There's a few things I'd like to elaborate further on, so prepare for a long-ass post :p.

I could go into serious depth and write my own story, but i'll keep it short - i'm in a 'foot relationship' with an extremely good straight friend at the moment.
As much as I liked your story (loved the happy ending :D), I could never see myself do something like this. I consider foot worship to be sexual, and I'd have trouble looking my friend in the eyes after doing something like this, even if he was okay with it. Also, I see friends as friends and nothing more. It is as if my brain refuses to let me look at them in a different way, as I'm not even slightly attracted to any of my current male friends.

greetings from BoyWonder in Chicago...I also am in the baot as all you guys are..man how I wish we were avail to meet, maybe not a bad idea as a group event somwhere just as the bondage and tickle events.
I'm not trying to be destructive here, but this is something I'm very reluctant to do. Since we're talking a relatively small group of people scattered over the WORLD, it seems that these meetings would gather 20-30 people at a time at best.

But the main problem is, that even if more than that showed up, odds are I wouldn't find anyone of interest. I mean, I don't feel like I want to have sexual encounters with every 30th guy meet on the street, so why would this be any different? I'd love to have a sexual experience, but not just for the sake of it. It's also why I would never want to meet up with random people on the internet.

Am I being too picky when I say this?

odd as it is that the straight guys LOVE foot worship or love a good footrub or dream about the subject while guys that are gay admit its a turn off, hate their feet, hate the worship idea..ever so odd its not reversed?!
This is actually great news, as I feel attracted to straight guys like 90% of the time anyway.

[blablablabla]

All what i have just said is pure personal opinion, and i'm only writing from my own experience and why it is i think i like feet. If you think what i've said is rubbish, reply and tell us why, this topic is really interesting to me and i want to hear why other gays guys like feet. Is it only the physical side of it i.e. the look, smell, taste of the foot, no matter who it belongs to, straight, gay or whatever. Or is it like i said, more of the mental side of things that gets you off (even though you still like the physical aspect of feet)?.... :D
Well, for me personally it's 100% physical. I feel it's pretty much the same way as most straight guys are attracted to female breasts. Everytime I hear/see straight guys talking about women's boobs, I could just replace the word "woman" with "man" and "boob" with "foot" and feel the same way.

As for the person it belongs to, it matters a lot to me. An ugly guy just isn't gonna get me excited, no matter how great his feet are :/.

I'm like you also. The main thing that turns me on are male bare feet. I've "compromised" with guys in the past just so I can get at their feet. It's tough to find someone who is a total foot top/bottom that want's to get together on a regular basis. All I can say to you is don't give up. He's out there somewhere.

I'd love to hear more about the "compromises" you made, since part of the reason for my topic was not only to seek people with similar problems, but also more info about how they overcame them.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not asking for a detailed story or anything ;). Just general stuff, did you regret compromising the first time? Did you keep doing it for the sole (pun intended) purpose of getting feet, or did it somehow grow on you? Is it something that you now look back at thinking: "wow, I was really prudish back then", or do you still struggle with it now and then?


I have always said that if anyone ever held a pill out and said "take this and you'll be heterosexual" my answer would be,and still would be "No thanks."
Same goes for my "kinks".


This is something I'll never understand. I hear a lot of gay people say this in discussions, and I don't get why.

Regardless of how you look at it, all you're basically doing is increasing your possibly partner pool with a factor of 10. You'll have no idea what it feels like to be attracted to the same sex, and therefor you'll never feel as "a gay man who turned straight". (at least, that's how I understand this "hetero pill" would work.

For me personally the extra reason would be that everyone would auto-accept me. However, like some people mentioned here before, I'm not entirely in peace with my own sexual orientation yet. I totally understand, and most importantly respect, people that "don't give a shit about what others think".)

However, are you really willing to make things harder on yourself only to prove a point? Wouldn't your whole "i don't care what other people think" be somewhat of a paradox if you didn't choose for the mathematically most interesting option? Or are you just afraid of pills? :p

[gianni9uk]

Just out of curiosity, how do you feel about intimacy in general? I'm in a kind of similar situation in that conventional sex stuff (oral, anal) does little for me, and of course foot stuff is a HUGE turn-on, but for me, just as big a turn-on is general intimacy; tender kissing, cuddling, licking all over the body (although I have to confess I love rimming), and unsurprisingly my biggest turn-on is playing footsie. I just love the tender and romantic side of being with a man, I find that I tend to just go through the motions with all the conventional stuff. In fact I have occasionally been with a guy he has cum as a result of oral sex, but for me to get off I have just had to press my feet against his feet sole to sole while jerking off, and I have the biggest orgasms.

[ropedfeet]

It is not even about "making things harder to prove a point"

I am the way I am because that is how I am, and how I always have been. The same as it is for millions of gay men out in the world. I have never had any desire or intentions of "changing" because that is not even possible. Not to mention that I, like so many other gay men in the world love being gay.

The only choice would be to live my life hiding who I really am and trying to ignore my real feelings.

Again, no thanks.

I wish you lots of luck in your quest for self understanding and acceptance.


Just remember that life is short....some things are not bad the way they are at all, its how we live with it that counts.

I don't think anyone likes 100% of themselves, but its great when you can be at peace with the basics of who and what you are.

[SnowFanatic]

I can definitely more than relate cause it's the exact same situation for me as well. I'm also 25, zero experience, very picky and it's all about feet, conventional sex doesn't turn me on. Though I've to say I am attracted to men, so it's not exactly "all about feet", it's extremely important who they belong to in the first place. What gianni9uk said, intimacy in general is a big *yes* for me. I love cuddling, tender kissing etc.

Regarding your questions, those who are more experienced will definitely help you more, but IMHO there's no unique formula, no exact rules to follow. It's all extremely individual, just like everything else in life, and once you develop a certain relationship, you will know what to do, how to do it etc.

But it's a great topic, it's great to hear people's experiences and it's a great community in general. Wish we would have more of these interesting discussions.

[gbmcleod]

What makes life hardest for any of us starts with feeling deserving of our SELF, whoever that "self" happens to be.

Nobody here wants to see you miserable, so lets say that up front. The issue, though, is not really "feet" as much as it sounds like you had poor support from your parents/family/guardians or living situation growing up, which leads to low self-esteem. The lower your sellf-esteem, the less likely it is that you will like ANYTHING about yourself, or think that ANYTHING you like is worthy of respect. It's pretty clear that that is going to be the biggest stumbling block for you. Given that you're very young though, please consider getting therapy so that you can enjoy the adventures that lie ahead for you. It's hard to even see life AS an adventure if you suffer from melancholy or depression, and with all due respect, it sounds as though this is what's going on with you. You're no less deserving than anyone else, and being gay is not the real issue. There are straight guys -- and women -- who feel like they don't deserve anything either. There are people who are depressed because they only have one leg, or one arm,and they probably feel like nobody is ever going to like or accept them, either. Feeling alone and isolated is FAR less rare than you think, and, in fact, as a former crisis counselor, let me tell you: a LOT of the population suffers from feelings of self-worth, and I mean a LOT. It's estimated that at least 5% of the US population suffers from depression. That's around 1 in every 25 people in any room you're in has consistent feelings of depression.
Think about it -- and then do yourself a favor, and reach out for assistance, no matter how momentarily embarrasing it is. Your older self will thank your younger self for doing it one day.

[blablablabla]

Where exactly do you get the impression that I'm depressed or have a low self-esteem? I have wonderful parents that took great care of me, and I'm 100% sure if I told them I was gay they wouldn't care one bit.

Like I said, the real reason I haven't outed myself yet is that I'm unsure how to proceed. I know very well that I'm in a minority situation. This doesn't give me low self-esteem, but it makes me wary of the difficulties that lie ahead in finding a partner. Especially since I personally have such a limited interest.

I am perfectly fine living my life the way I do now, since I don't feel like I'm hiding something. I act in exactly the same way I would if people around me knew everything about me. The only thing I'm slowly starting to feel is loneliness and the need for someone to share my life with.

[blablablabla]

I can definitely more than relate cause it's the exact same situation for me as well. I'm also 25, zero experience, very picky and it's all about feet, conventional sex doesn't turn me on. Though I've to say I am attracted to men, so it's not exactly "all about feet", it's extremely important who they belong to in the first place. What gianni9uk said, intimacy in general is a big *yes* for me. I love cuddling, tender kissing etc.


You sound like someone that could be a good friend :P.

Maybe I gave the wrong impression that I ONLY like feet, which is untrue. Like you said, I do like a male figure in general. It's just that a guy with pants on turns me on 100x more than one without, which is definitely, ehm, unconventional to say the least ;). I don't know if you know the website footfriends.com. It has quite some guys doing live webcams, and everyone in the chat is like OMG SHOW YOUR DICK PLZ. I almost feel like I'm straight at that point...

About intimacy, it's hard to imagine what it feels like when you never actually kissed or hugged a guy, but I feel like that wouldn't really interest me that much. I mean, if I could do anything I want with a guy I think is hot, I doubt cuddling would be on top the list :p

[ftslave67]

What "roped" said. When I was young, I used to pray that I would change, or turn out hetero. But now that I am older, I have put away childish things and fully accept and love myself. Once you accept that sexual orientation is not a choice, there is no reason to want to change it. It is those who do not accept you that have the (mental) problem.

[SnowFanatic]

I don't know if you know the website footfriends.com. It has quite some guys doing live webcams, and everyone in the chat is like OMG SHOW YOUR DICK PLZ. I almost feel like I'm straight at that point...

Lol, footfriends.com was actually the first foot-site I discovered when I got my first computer. I can't remember if it was free back then but I still remember the first pics: some guy with another guy's foot in his face, how unusual. But it was a major shock for me back then (to say the least), and a major turn-on as well because I hadn't seen anything like that before. Anyway, back on topic, I haven't been there in ages, truth to be told, I actually don't frequent such sites cause I'm simply not interested, but I can imagine what it's like lol.

Re: intimacy, as I said in my previous post, I'd say it's extremely individual. When there's a certain relationship established, you'll know what you want/ need. Not everyone likes cuddling. :p
I understand how you feel, cause we seem to be going through a similar process, the time comes when you feel you need that someone. You want to have that first relationship... I guess it's natural. Here's wishing we find someone special heh. ;)